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Sock Monkey Christmas Card

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Sock Monkey Christmas Card

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bringing natalie into the world (my birthing story)

It was July 7, 2011-- I had my last check-up before Natalie would be born, by my side I had Christian and my best friend Azalia. When we were in the waiting room, all I could think was please hurry call me back to the room! After a wait that seemed like forever finally my name was called back. When we got into the room he did the exam every pregnant woman dreads, of course I was not dilated or effaced at all. So we scheduled a C-section, which was going to happen anyways for a "big baby". It was scheduled for Friday, July 8, 2011 at 1 p.m.. I cried when the doctor set up everything, because in that moment it was all real. The baby I had been carrying for 9 months, would be brought into the world and I knew exactly when it was going to happen or so I thought. I went to do my blood work and was told I could not have any visitors until Saturday because of everything they do after a c-section to mommy and baby. So after I left the hospital I immediately called my family members, everyone was excited except for a few, who thought I just did not want them at the hospital. It resulted in a huge fight that left me crying in pain from being called selfish and a liar. I cried from 1 to 8 that night, then I felt a warm liquid run down my leg. I freaked out, called my doctor he said to come in and get checked out. So Christian was at his moms an hour away and I called him get home quick I think my water broke! I made sure my bags had everything and I was pacing back and forth. That night I decided not to call anyone because I had stressed myself out so much, that I just wanted this moment to be peaceful. Christian finally got home and we headed out to the hospital 30 minutes away. When we finally got there we had to wait for a room for about 20 minutes then I finally got one. The doctor came in and did an examination to see if I was leaking amniotic fluid or if I had just "peed on myself". They came back 10 minutes later and said yes you definitely have leaked amniotic fluid. So they did another exam and said you ruptured a membrane, we need to get you on antibiotics immediately. Finally after being poked and filled with liquids, all I could say was I'm hungry can I have food.

So of course they brought me food, which was the nastiest food I've ever tasted but I was able to enjoy the roll and the fruit :) Finally the nurse said she wouldn't say anything if Christian sneaked some McDonald's in, I loved that nurse. So I sent Christian on a McDonald's mission. He came back and I can honestly say it was the best McDouble and Fries I ever had. So around 1 a.m. I was told they moved my c-section up to the morning sometime when they could fit me in. I tried sleeping but I was to nervous/excited to get any sleep, but Christian definitely got his rest poor thing was exhausted. The next Morning around 6 a.m. they came in and said it was time to prep. At this time I thought I was going to vomit everywhere I was freaking out. So many thoughts went through my head you'd think I would have been freaking out more about the fact that I was about to have a baby... NOPE I was freaked out about the epidural/spinal tap. They then gave christian his outfit, he was just the cutest ever in it.

It was 9:20 a.m., after meeting the anesthesiologist, nurse, and everyone that would be there. They told me it was time and quickly rushed me out of my room. I went into a room that was very cool and extremely bright white. They had Christian wait outside of the room while they did the epidural/spinal tap thing. I thought I was going to pass out scariest thing in my life mostly because I hate needles and the thought of a huge one in my back ahhh! They laid me down and all I kept saying was please please don't forget Christian he has to be here. Then the whole bottom half of me went numb I was laughing because it was so freaky but then I started crying because I felt paralyzed I could not move my legs at all. I was scared at that moment. Then they brought Christian in seeing him beside me and holding my hand helped me relax a little. All I could feel was pressure and they told Christian to lift up, he got to see them pull her out of me. He says he probably shouldn't have looked, I think it freaked him out a little. Finally I heard it, I heard her first cry and in that very moment all I could do was cry. I cried because my baby she was finally here, it was so real. Then I freaked out because I couldn't see her face that went with the cry I just wanted to hold her and see her. They let Christian go take her first picture.

Born at: 9:28 a.m on 7-8-11/ weight:8 lbs 10 oz./ length: 21 1/2 inches long.

They sent Natalie and Christian to the nursery to do test and her first bath. I was rushed to recovery and given medicine to counteract the side effects from the morphine. I was sad all I wanted was to see all those first moments and I couldn't I had to be in recovery for about 2 hours and still hadn't gotten to hold my baby.

Then I was taken to my post-partum room still wanting to see my baby but they said I could not lift up yet, and they were still monitoring her roughly six hours later they finally brought her into my room to see me, I still could not lift up but I kind of got to hold her.

Oh this was the best moment, I finally got to see and feel my baby. but since I couldn't hold her still they gave her to Christian. It didn't matter though all I cared about was that she was in my room with me and I could see her. Oh and believe me seeing father and daughter together is priceless. There is something that changes in a man, when he holds his child.

 So about 2 more hours later I was finally allowed to raise up in my bed and the lactation consultant came in so we could start trying to breastfeed. My goodness it is crazy how your body reacts to your baby. Our bodies are so amazing as soon as they laid my babygirl on my chest, the milk was more than ready. I then was able to hold her and  I did not want to let her go!

This is a moment I will never forget.

So then we had to move rooms because the air conditioning in my room was broken. We moved rooms and I still hadn't been able to get out of my bed or change any of her diapers or anything, but I could feed her and hold her and that was okay with me. We got into our room and I could not wait to change her into her outfit we brought from home and take tons of pictures of her.

We had to record every diaper we changed and what was in it and how often we fed her and for long. We were mommy and daddy, and it was an amazing feeling. I felt more love for that man, that was by side every step of the way than I ever had before. So we dressed her up and enjoyed every minute of her and just stared at how beautiful our baby was to us.

All I could think was she's perfect.

She's all OURS.

She loves me.

This is Our Family.

I stayed up all night staring at her, loving her, and just holding her. They came in around 6 a.m. and said the pediatrician is just going to look at her and we will bring her right back. About 2 hours passed and I kept asking where's my baby? It's been a long time. They just kept saying she will be back soon, don't worry. Finally the pediatrician came in and said she was Coombs+ and severely jaundiced. So they have her in the level 2 NICU nursey under lights and she would not be able to stay in my room. I cried and I cried I had only got to spend like 12 hours with her and she couldn't come back to me. I was so upset I just wanted to hold my baby. My next thought was, what about breastfeeding how am I supposed to breastfeed. They then told me that I could go every 3 hours and feed her. So I had to start walking the day after my c-section it was hard but it was very much worth it to see my baby girls face. It was the saddest thing to see the goggles they put on there eyes and all the lights. What was even more sad is it wasn't just my baby there were many more babies in there and I just new how the others mothers felt. I was on time every three hours for the next 4 days I was in the NICU to see my baby. Oh and she loved seeing me and I loved seeing her. They told me if her levels went down she could come back to my room with me. so everyday they checked her blood twice a day and I was just sure she would be better. No it got worse each day, I was scared and all I wanted to do was hold her. The family I did have down there were the same ones that were fighting with me, I called them and kept them updated but they didn't care to come see me. I was hurt about everything. Finally I had a few good friends who came to see me and brought gifts to cheer me up. Then more news to upset me I was completley set on only breastfeeding and they told me that supplementing with formula would help make her better. I cried and cried because formula was not what I wanted to do. I did know that if it would help to make her better then I would do it. So it was 3 days later and her levels were still at a 13. Why wasn't it going down? I just kept asking myself and praying please let her get better soon.

Not only was she jaundiced but I was guilty because I had allowed myself to cry so much and get so upset that I ruptured my membrane the night before I had her and when that happened somehow my blood got to her blood and tried to fight her off because we had different blood types so my body created antibodies, which made her coombs+. I felt responsible that she was in there, If I hadn't let the argument with my family get to me then I wouldn't have ruptured my membrane. On the third day in the hospital they wanted to keep her in there and send me home. I was so upset they told me I could come visit to breastfeed but I lived 20 minutes away, you cant drive for 2 weeks after a c-section, and Christian had to work. After that my mom who I had not seen in 3 years said she was driving down from California because I needed someone there with me. That really helped me and then luckily my doctor was amazing and said you have insurance and I think you need to stay an extra day. He reminded me with a C-section you have up to 4 days hospital stay. I stayed that extra day and around noon of the 4th day they let me know that Natalie's levels were stable and she would be able to leave with me. They brought her into my room and I was so excited. I got to change my first diaper and change her again. I was able to hold my baby in my arms again and knew that she would be going home with me that day. My friends Azalia and Jaime came to visit us that day and Jaime brought natalie a little dog :).

Hanging out with mama while we waited for daddy to get off work to come get us.

Finally it was time Christian was coming to get us. My mom was almost to our house! I was so excited I had been waiting for this day. So I got Natalie changed into her outift to come home and packed up all of our stuff.

Her coming home Outfit :)

Finally ready to come home.

Christian got to the hospital loaded up the car, the nurse walked us down.

It was real finally we were bringing our babygirl home. It was a long, hard, stressful week and with very little support at that. We made it though, now we could go home and be a family.

Everything after that has gone so fast and been so amazing she is now a 3 month old healthy beautiful little girl. Yes I know i'm writing this 3 months later but I've been busy loving my baby. Thank you for reading this and I'm glad I could relive this moment with you all.

us at 3 months

photoshoots & roasted chicken.

I haven't been on in a couple of days so lets catch up.

On Tuesday Natalie had a photoshoot. It was so much fun!

she was being such a little model, smiling, cooing, just reminding me how lucky I am to be her mother.

This is the moment when your child looks into you eyes and makes you feel like the most important person in the world. Nobody can love you as much as they do.

I think it's self explanatory that we had a very fun time. You can find this photographer at http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1279016536#!/pages/Never-Ending-Memories-Photography/203897936346276

So that was yesterday and then today I made an oven herb roasted chicken :)

It was amazing as usual..

yumm! Happy Wednesday my friends!



monday :)

Oh what a good day it was, we thought Christian was supposed to work then he came back home and turned out he didn't! yay!

So I cooked again..
we had Meatloaf my first time ever making one and I must brag it was absolutely amazing!
and for dessert Million Dollar Pie something my granny and pawpaw made all the time when I was little!

Natalie of course has been being cute all day spending time with her mama!
anyways that was all for today Tomorrow is a PHOTOSHOOT for NATALIE yaaaay!

Not so Lazy Sunday!

So today was a good day!
I cleaned.. not usual for me lol..
I cooked semi-homemade shredded beef taquitos!
I made a baby food jar sewing kit!
The most fun I had today though had to be spending time with my beautiful baby girl!

Happy Sunday!